Tiger's Bust

...Like Disneyland (if you replace the giant friendly  mouse with a bunch of puking students)

 

Tigers "bend" was actually Tiger Land (I wish that people would learn how to pronounce English -would have saved me from walking around getting blank stares as I asked for directions to Tiger's Bend).

And; it sucked. Like a Hoover on steroids, it sucked...
I finally found it, after walking two miles, following directions, such as "Down that way" and stopping at a Circle K, where the dude behind the counter said "Dude, just stand by that pole out front and the free bus will come and take you right there.

The free bus came and I got on. There were two other people sitting across from me, a young black couple.

At the first stop that the free bus made, at an "off campus" apartment complex, the bus loaded up with rowdy students; all of them white, none darker than the one guy, who may have had a little bit of Hawaiian in him. I couldn't help watch, out of the corner of my eye, the black girl watching her black boyfriend out of the corner of her eye, as the white girls streamed onto the bus and he watched them, out of the corner of his eye...she folder her arms across her chest; and seemed to be fighting the urge to tap her foot.

The bus arrived at Tiger Land, which was kind of isolated from the rest of the campus, being situated in between corn fields by some railroad tracks, on the outskirts. The tracks would became more and more tempting to me as the evening progressed.

It was like the noisy end of Bourbon Street in New Orleans; except college kids seem to be broke in these depressed times; pissed off at the world because they are broke in these depressed times, and using alcohol to escape the stress of being broke in these depressed times and ready to take out their angst by yelling "You Suck!" at a musician.

All of the clubs there, in a row, were drowning me out wherever I went, except out in the cornfield.

"All you can drink" specials, seem to be the rage, in these depressed times -pay 20 bucks, drink all night...this made for a lot of kids who probably scraped up the 20 bucks (by raiding their sofa cushions of its pennies) and who took the free Tiger Lines (purple, of course) bus there; where they drank too much and developed nasty dispositions, out of anxiety over "how are we going to party tomorrow night, now that the sofa is bare"

Have any of the geniuses who run those clubs ever balanced the equation: All you can drink + immature college kids = X? ...but their not driving...

After an hour of walking around and having one guy's friends restrain him from coming after me, as he yelled "I'll kick your ass on the guitar, I'll smoke you on guitar, dude!" I went to wait for the very next free bus out of there, after having spent myself down to just the pennies in my Crown Royal bag/weapon (to go with the pepper spray in my left hand) and was treated to the sight of a girl who was oblivious to the fact that one of her breasts was hanging out of her dress, because she was too busy puking...
What Do You Expect For Nothing?

Southern Live Oak tree

The free bus driver told me that she didn't go anywhere near Chime Street, which is where Howard and I had chosen to spend the night, under the canopy of one of the Southern Live Oak trees, which border a lacrosse/soccer/frisbee/tanning field. We would be well hidden there, and it was convenient to shopping for a morning energy drink, and near a Jack-In-The-Box restaurant, an establishment which has supplanted McDonalds as Howard's breakfast provider. "Their breakfasts really aren't that bad..."

I mentally prepared myself for a long walk back to that spot after receiving this bad news from the free bus driver; but; in keeping with the tradition of bad directions, which is alive and well in Baton Rouge, it turned out that the free bus driver had badly overestimated the distance from her northernmost stop on Highland Street to Chime Street (what do you expect for nothing?) and, after taking a few steps in a northerly direction, I recognized the tree which Howard was already asleep under. I joined him in slumber land.

We got up around 3:30 a.m.,after feeling raindrops landing upon us, and moved to the foyer of an Episcopal church, which was right across the street, and slept until daylight, when Howard got up to fetch his coffee, breakfast and newspaper, and I went off to get an energy drink (off of my food card, since I was down to a handful of pennies). thus avoiding Howard's morning question of "How'd you do last night?"

I had exactly zero cigarettes (and the ground was wet, so, there wouldn't be any smoke-able half smoked ones on the ground). I felt the onset of that "totally broke" feeling in the pit of my stomach, as I walked to the Circle K near Chime Street.

I dreaded Howards morning question more than anything; embarrassed by the prospect of having to tell him that I hadn't made a dime, and that I had spent my last one on beer, to numb myself to the anxiety of living in these depressed times, and that I was out of cigarettes, and one broken string away from falling into a hole, the likes of which I haven't been in since before I moved to New Orleans.*

*Mobile, Alabama, August, 2010: Flat broke with a guitar which was missing one string and which had strings which wouldn't stay in tune -an instrument which had been given to me by a friend (Scott the paramedic) after mine had been stolen. (See "They Stole My Guitar" from 8/2010)- I wound up making 80 bucks that night, with that guitar -it was "Beerfest" night in Mobile -and buying a new one the next day.

I will technically never sink to a new low, as long as I have the harmonica; even if all my strings break, except one. 

Saved By Zero

I had the song "Saved By Zero," by The Fixx, in my head as I walked towards the Circle K. I was wondering if I could be strong enough to not wimp out and use the inevitable morning question from Howard as an opportunity to whine and complain in such a way as to prompt him to give me money. I don't think it is right to postpone the karma that I bring upon myself by my actions, especially when those actions are spawned by my weakness for tobacco and alcohol.

Plus, he had given me 5 bucks the day before.

I got an energy drink, and then left the store. As I walked across the parking lot I saw, on the ground next to the drivers side of a car, nearly a whole cigarette, which was still lit.

I walked over to it, just as a lady was coming out of the store. As I was picking it up, it became evident that the car belonged to the lady.

"Is this yours?," I asked her, thinking that she may have just thrown it down because she couldn't bring it in the store, intending to pick it back up and finish it.

"Do you need a cigarette?" she asked, as she was opening her car door. "I'll give you whatever is left in my pack."

Her pack only had one left. "I'll buy you a pack. What kind do you want?"

"The cheapest, Pall Malls would be fine, thank you so much"

She emerged from the store and handed me a pack of Pall Malls and a five dollar bill.

"Here, get yourself something to eat," she said.
"Wow, I guess I'm glad that your pack didn't have a few left!"

I thanked her (profusely) and told her a bit of the story of my ill fated trip to Tigerland, the previous night.

"That's the new generation for you," she said, before wishing me luck and driving off.

On the way back to the Episcopal church, ready now to field The Morning Question, I ran into a black man, who was in the parking lot of Serranos Bar and Restaurant.

I told him that I was looking for a spot where I would be able to play that night for tips. I mentioned that someone else had told me that there was an older black gentleman who busked in the area, but that that person hadn't seen him in a while.

"Oh, you mean Leroy. Yeah, he plays over there, right at the Circle K."

Leroy

I thanked him and then went to find Howard so we could go looking for a Starbucks, which we found, and the Troy D. Middleton library, on the campus of LSU, where I now sit.
The Starbucks couldn't take my gift card because they weren't technically a Starbucks, but the nice Asian girl gave me my coffee for free, after I had made her giggle by requesting that she put 6 ice cubes in my coffee, to bring it down from 190 degrees, to about 120, and then added "If you put 7, I'm going to know, and I'll make you re-do it!"
Me, A Tiger?!?
Tonight, I will try to set up and play around the general area of the Circle K, provided that Leroy isn't already there..
Before that, I might just pop into the Financial Aid Office, here at LSU and ask them if it is possible for a 49 year old homeless man to go back to college, and maybe have Obama foot the bill...