The Unenviable Position

10 days after shooting, wearing color other than black

for first time in months

I am in the unenviable position where, if I take the night off, I'm going to be spending it with a sick feeling in my stomach that, on such a nice warm, slightly foggy night (on a calendar date that has been 20 degrees with a strong wind in the past) I am surely missing someone who would come along and sit and listen and throw me at least 20 bucks.

Right now, I feel like I am in a work-hoard mode. I am either working and making money, or hunkered down in the apartment jealously guarding it; not even wanting to buy a newspaper to read over coffee, wanting just enjoy the slight feeling of security that having about 85 bucks on my prepaid card is giving me.

I can't totally take my mind off of working, though.

It is just a bit past the time when I typically start heading for the Lilly Pad, and so, I think I will have one more coffee at the apartment, pack up my stuff and go back into work mode.

It will only be for 3 hours, tops. And I will only hit that 3 hour mark if someone is hanging out and talking and probably leaving me one of those "millionaire guy" tips.

Of course, I have to factor in that there is the same amount of "danger" in going out on a night when I am hoping to make 20 bucks as there would be on a busier night.
 
With the laptop coming soon, I know I will soon be spending extended periods occupied with the thing.

I want to find a place; the unused for years Catholic church right next door to our apartments would be ideal; where I can bring my recording rig; laptop and snowball (I might have to buy a new battery for the laptop, as that is the one caveat that most of the machines in my price range came with; batteries the original ones and not guaranteed) and can work on getting my singing voice back in shape.

It, just like the harmonicas, I have been "blowing out" by singing too loudly at the Lilly Pad.
I want to find a room somewhere, no electricity or running water necessary, that I can use to experiment musically, in such a way that a neighbor might suspect that (now) I was intentionally trying to bother him....then he started doing, I don't know, it sounded like a Tarzan yell!...oh, he's messing with me alright, well, he's gonna get a big surprise when he goes to get on that bike and the tires are flat! type of thing.

One thing that I used to do was ride my bike a few miles out of the city on a two lane road and wait until it crossed over any kind of bridge out in the middle of nowhere, not a soul in sight for a mile in either direction; and then get under the structure and use it as a studio (after clearing it of water moccasins). The drawback was, of course, no feedback from a live audience. The blessing, of course, no b.s. from a live "audience."