Colors Find Me

Me And You Are Subject To The Jews Now And Then

https://youtu.be/WA8XH-u09Cg?si=T4hgb19LZfivyFRX

One Byte Over A Killo (Of Words)

Thursday morning and  I was up around 6 in the morning.

Harold had been  outside for about as long as I'd slept, maybe seven and a half hours...

I wanted to  go offer to let him in, but I also was intent upon completing The Morning Pages -three longhand pages of stream of consciousness, as prescribed by the "The Artist's Way" author, Julia Cameron. Harold has become rather rigid in a habit of immediately seeking my attention as soon as he's done eating. Immediately after eating, upon coming back inside, he will, while still licking his lips come over and dig his claws into the couch like he's stretching; and then jump up and lay on top of whatever I have next to me -a mirror loaded with cocaine, whatever- and he will have started meowing steadily, and then will press his butt against me, facing away, and continuing to meow, like he's not going to stop.

I know at  least two "cat people" who will say that he's "saying" "Scratch me" and that's where I would put my money, but I have a problem with him turning away from me, unless it has to do with the direction that my nails would scratch him in, perhaps it feels better to him to be scratched with the grain of his fir...

But, the whole  appeal of him as a pet is whatever intelligence he may have, which is seated in his head, which he's facing away from me.

I have previously  had to tell him to sleep, like when I'm trying to do the Wim Hof deep breathing method, and I had to pick him up and transport him to the next room, but I felt like I owed him some kind of explanation, so I said "I'm doing my breathing, Harold!, stretching the syllables of "breeeethiiiing..." out, kind of similating deep breathing, and I had gotten him to begrudgingly accept his full stomach and soft bed, without also being scratched.

I give him  credit, though, for an ability to change the tone and inflection of his meows. The "begrudging" tone is pretty distinct, but, if I persist in trying to ignore him, he'll start making his meows sound like "Harold" and I haven't been able to ignore that one, for the same intelligence that it hints might exist in him...

Not intelligent enough  to figure out that turning fully away from someone and pressing your butt against her is rude, maybe, but definitely able to change the tone of meows to convey things like "that feels good" or "that hurts" while being scratched.

I made harold  wait an extra 35 minutes to come in and did The Morning Pages.

I think Harold  is becoming more predictable in his habits is because I've been becoming more regular in my own, lately.

I feel like  I'm becoming a different person, or at least a different personality, due to perhaps the creatine monohydrate that I've been taking about 7 grams of every day for what is probably right around 6 months, now. I just saw an ad for some concoxtion of probiotics with cranberry extract and a few other ingredients, and the AI generated voice over (probably) was pretty adamant about how important it is to get a 6 month supply of the stuff. They cautioned that, as their company expands, there may be times when their warehouse has been temporarily cleaned out, by popular demand. And, it would be a shame if, just when your body is starting to respond to the stuff and real healing is on the horizon, you have to discontinue it while waiting for the supply chain to catch up, type of thing..

I think it  is because of marketing.

The amount of  people willing to venture $40 on some probiotic cranberry stuff is most likely huge, and they don't want to miss out on that "curiousness" driven demographic, even though they know that 6 months on the stuff will have a transformational impact.

I think that  is smart, especially if there is an immediately noticeable benefit by month three, that would prompt the individual to order more...

But, that made  me wonder about there being things that take six months to really kick in, and if it isn't the creatine monohydrate, more than the sardine fast, that has me feeling like a different person, or a third thing.

That would be  the "Introduction To Astral Projecting" videos that I've been watching more frequently, lately, and actually participating in them, by falling asleep while they emanated from speakers on each side of my head.

Astral projecting is  something I actually hadn't had pause to consider since I was in jail back in '92.

There was a  guy who was facing a double murder charge there, who was a fledgling practicioner of astral projection. He had a book on the subject, with fittingly cool art on the cover, and the guy was basically trying to leave his cell and walk the beaches of Guam every night. He was also on some kind of psych medications. Most likely the most intense that 1992 had to offer; suitable for the likes of a double murderer, type of thing..

My feeling on  the matter is, and was, that if you know you're trying to leave your body and travel places because you're stuck in prison for probably the rest of your life, and wouldn't have the faintest interest in that realm if free to roam and murder people two, by two...it's probably not going to work so well.

But, anyways, I'm  finally fixing my electric guitar, turning it back to a normal guitar from being a Frankenstein that had one bass guitar string slotted in with the rest. It made for some interesting inversions of chords providing unusual bass notes, but now it can become the more standard six string, like George Harrison played...

It's late afternoon.  I' about to do some kind of guided meditation, perhaps in order to meet my higher self on the astral plane. Jeez, wouldn't it be quite the coincidence if I run into that guy from jail up there, after just talking about him...?

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Here's To Your Health; Sardine Fast Resumes

This is Saturday  morning at around 9:45, and I have already run to the stores for coffee, distilled water and sardines..

3 large tins  of that storied, iconic fish.

There was a  Latino guy, about 18 years old, but maybe 15, stocking the shelves at the Ideal Market, right by the sardines, who attempted to help me select cans -probably so I would be out of his way sooner- by locating more of the kind I had picked out from the half dozen of so varieties they sell there.

Only the "La  Serena" brand in the "in chipotle sauce" and "in jalapeño" varieties don't have xanthan gum nor "thickener" listed as ingredients, so I was focusing on those. 

I have yet to research xanthan gum as a food additive, but I can already imagine Dr. Sten Ekberg -bald head and all- in a "I ate only sardines for 30 days, and here's what happened" video, which I imagine he has, if the sardine fast is worth its salt, cautioning his sardine-adventurers: "If the ingredients list mentions 'xanthan gum' or 'thickener,' you want to avoid it," type of thing.

And then going  on to say that xanthan gum is the same thing they use to boost the octane of Formula One racing fuel, or that they distill it from orangutan feces or something."

"...and does that  sound like something you want to put in your body?"

But, I was  trying to load up on the chipotle and minimize the jalepeño variety, but the kid had retrieved more of the latter from the maze of cans, and had offered to hand them to me. 

I didn't know  how to say: "If I just live off the jalepeño kind, I'll develop a burning irritation in my rectum, and I'll wind up having to shove a Q-tip up my asshole to scratch it..."

As a 2nd  year Spanish student, that was out of my league.

"Siri, how do  you say 'Q-tip' in Spanish?" type of thing...

Is Xanthan Gum Bad For You? 

Foods contain a very small amount of xanthan gum. In these small quantities, xanthan gum is not bad for you, and it’s considered safe to consume. It also doesn’t cause side effects for most people. -WebMD

I left there  with 2 cans of each, having rushed a bit to facilitate getting out of his way, lest he think I was intentionally trying to be a pain in his ass, standing there reading the fine print on 12 different cans.

Having run out  of food money a week ago, and then having lost the spotlight (again) that I use to illuminate the stage at the Lilly Pad -concurrent with Jacob being put out of commission by car troubles- put me in a position to conduct an experiment upon the box of food that comes, as if by magic, the third Thursday of every month, to each resident of Sacred Heart, who is over 60, from some charitable organization.

It is about  a one week supply of The Standard American Diet.

Having the proclivity  to be a conspiracy theorist, I have looked at the "senior food box" (as it is referred to by the residents) with a shadow under my eyes, so to speak.

First off, the  words of my late father come to me: There's nothing free in this world; you're going to pay one way or another, I paraphrase...

Second, I think  about the tacit implication that "a nigga's" food stamps have been kind of pre-calculated to have run out by the third Thursday of every month, and, isn't that interesting?

People who are  strangers to intermittent fasting might not view these last few days of every month as being divinely ordained as a time of fasting and prayer. Rather, they might have the notion that one has to eat 3 meals every day or starve to death..

"At least I  got this to eat," they might think, before going to work on the 3 pound brick of "process" cheese product. (See Dr. Sten Ekberg's video entitled something like: "This Ain't Even Cheese, Dog!" for more on the 'government cheese...').

There was a  guy who lived here named Lionell. He was known to really love the orange cheese. If you didn't want yours give it to Lionell, type of thing.

Lionell died of  some kind of cancer about 3 years ago. He was 57, I believe.

The way the  box got me was through the low-fat powdered milk. I added it to my coffee while ostensibly a couple days into a one week water-only fast. I figured I would remain in 'ketosis,' although the lactose in milk is technically a sugar, I believe Dr, Sten said..

But, after being  driven by demons to go out and get some alcohol on or about the 3rd day, with that being straight liquor (no carbs; though alcohol is technically a sugar, according to Dr. Sten) I was beset with the urge to cook one of the "spaghetti's" from the box, rationalizing that I was going to use a lot of extra virgin olive oil and/or real butter on the finished product. That would give my body a choice of fuels to burn, carbs or fats, the good kind of Omega-3 fats...

This led to  me waking up feeling depressed for the first time since before I started the sardine fast 5 weeks ago. It was just about 10 minutes of thinking that human beings were just animals, a baby step up from cockroaches in intelligence, and only through our self aggrandizement do we envision our consciousnesses as composing a dream in the Mind of an infinitely loving God, and that anything we do is eventually going to be reduced to minerals as we dissolve into irrelevance...like, how are we going to preserve the music of Gustav Mahler once the universe has collapsed upon itself and there is the next Big Bang? type of thing...

Performing the exercise  of thinking up "3 things that I'm grateful for" before stepping out of bed, was proof against this; and I felt back to my 'normal' self within 10 or 15 minutes; But I had had to induce the actual "feeling" of gratitude the way an actor might make herself shed tears by willfully thinking of sad things.

There is usually  a sense of: It's not going to work this time; but it did; and, by the time I had had a tablespoon of kratom with creatine monohydrate powder, I felt pretty good. Although squatting down to do certain chores, I noticed the stiffness in my knee joints, which had disappeared about a week into the sardine fast, threatening to encroach upon me...

A couple nights  later, it was the peanut butter, fully hydrogenated cottonseed and/or soy oil and all that I stirred into the crunchy rice cereal that comes in the box, in powdered milk, sprinkled with pure cocoa powder and cinnamon, creating chocolate cinnamon peanut butter crunch...that I pigged out on, like it was an addictive drug..

I concluded the  next morning that the peanut butter definitely gives the government cheese a run for its money, as far as bringing on inflammation and the kind of brain fog that can make one forget about a pot of water left to boil on the stove.

"My" eczema started  to come back, in the form of itchy skin on the scalp and face, after just two losing battles against the senior food box.

I'm not sure  if the CEO's of Big Food are in cahoots with Big Pharma and/or Big Medicine. I've heard it said that there is a 'you keep them sick, we'll make money treating them, you'll make money overcharging them for drugs, the insurance companies will be the money movers...just tell us what we need their life expectancy to be, so we can adjust their medications accordingly, to make it all work...keep up the good work, we're killing it this quarter!" types of conversations behind closed doors..

Not in this  country, though, I ultimately conclude.

Putin, Zelinski or  Xi (not Netanyahu, though, let me be perfectly clear on that..) might do their citizenry that way; like sending millions to their deaths -they would probably even bomb a girl's elementary school, the sociopaths!

Ukraine's population of  white Christian men may have been decimated, and are now being replaced by a diverse group of immigrants, for example...

But this is  the west, where patriots are valued like loyal beagles. There are no such evil machinations going on here.

It's ultimately the  same individuals holding the reigns of power. but they know better than to try to exploit the U.S. citizens.

This is the  land of free cheese! Come and get it, niggas!

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