Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Preemptive Skeezer Strike

So far only 2 respondents to my Craig's List advertisement for my couch to crash on...

The 20 dollar per night amount asked for causes the ad to appear as the very first one to anyone who filters them based upon lowest price first. 
Emphasizing other aspects of the environment

I tend to think that the biggest problem with my ad was its lack of any photo.

The first respondent was "Max" from South Chicago*, who immediately asked to see a photo of the place, something that further discussions between us were contingent upon.
Without going into any theories about people in this visually afflicted culture, nor using metaphors about the number of words that a photo would have been worth, it suffices to say that the lack of any was a problem; if for no other reason than, (especially to a guy from South Chicago) "Who the hell doesn't even have a phone with a cheap camera or some other way to post a picture?!? Some crackhead trying to lure someone to an apartment through Craig's List and rob him, that's who!!"
And myself. I just don't have that technology yet.

But, I was able to retrieve and load up 3 pictures from my Facebook page and add them to the ad, which still appears first on the price critical list, and I will see how that goes.
I changed to wording also, adding the fact that I sought an "informal" arrangement, and that "a musician, like myself, would be ideal," and then, used the ploy of mentioning that I was situated nearby the India House hostel, which I described as being a place where international people congregate.

I figure that anyone who is looking for a place like the hostel and who finds that it is fully booked up, is probably not far from Googling "other cheap places in NOLA" which will bring them to my ad.
And it really is the person who might otherwise stay at the India House hostel that I envision as the perfect candidate to crash on my couch. I can tell this by the way they typically behaved on the street car rides into the Quarter. It stands to reason that international tourists, which comprise most of the hostel guests, would be on their best behavior in a strange land. But, who knows, maybe the toaster keeps getting stolen out of the India House hostel.

*I had mentioned my plans to rent the couch in a previous post, extolling the possibility that I might meet people from diverse cultures, and then added something like "maybe even South Chicago" to be funny.

Funny how the first respondent, Max, is from none other than South Chicago. That almost makes me think that it is one of the Unity people, who saw the blog post and is posing as a potential renter, trying to nail me with a violation of the terms of my lease, and who wants a photo to use as evidence. "South Chicago" being his little personal joke...

While Paranoid

While I am being paranoid, there is a crew working on the roof here, and this afternoon I looked out my window just as one of them was apparently taking a picture of my pot plant in the window. I think that it was fortuitous for me to have looked up just then.

As soon as I get off this computer, since it is now dark outside, I am going to move my plant out of the apartment and put it in a nearby outdoor hiding place where it is unlikely to be found.
This is staying one step ahead of "them."

There is no doubt in my mind that someone who is on the roof, working in 100 degree heat might harbor feelings of envy for myself and, especially probably, some other tenants whom they see carrying their cold beer past them on the way to their government subsidized apartments, and might get some kind of payoff from getting one of them thrown out. Especially if, before taking any action they conferred with other residents who might tell them that the owner of said apartment thinks that he is better than everybody else because he can go and play a guitar and make money (and those guys make a lot of money) but when he comes back he doesn't ever give anyone else money or cigarettes, and that they just wanted to see the guys face when they evict him.

I would love nothing more than to have a knock at my door in the near future and open it to see a couple guys who would say "surprise inspection," or something; and identify themselves somehow; and behind them have standing a row of smirking skeezers whom I would all recognize as having skeezed me before.

And then to let the guys in for their "surprise inspection," who would walk right through the apartment in a beeline to where the roofer guy's photo showed something that looked like a pot plant; while the skeezers in the hall craned their necks and searched their minds for witticisms like "Hope you know 'Back On The Street Blues,' guitar man!" (skeezer laughter echoing down the hall).
And then , after they had "inspected" the insides of closets and behind things, in order to make sure everything was working and that nothing was damaged, to have them leave, while I have the joy of seeing the face of the guy who is swearing to God that he saw a pot plant.

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